"The Plan"

They can put a man on the moon.
They can make a car that runs on used cooking oil.
Then it stands to reason that they can make it easy to lose weight.

C'mon, if they wanted us to eat healthy, they would make healthy food taste better. There should be a room full of scientists that are working on this problem, around the clock. Cheeseburgers and burritos should taste great and be good for you. Keeping us fat is big business.

For years I have been working on, what I call the "Cockroach Theory". The mighty cockroach has withstood the test of time, and will outlive everyone. The cockroach lives off of crap. It will eat anything and everything. So the theory is based on its ability to adapt to the environment. This would be a weak theory if we are looking at how it survives in the wild, but it has managed to thrive in the harsh world of processed foods as well. We have all heard of super viruses, that have mutated to withstand antibiotics. Humans should have evolved to be able to scarf down a bag of Twinkies and 92 ounces of soda, in one sitting. There must be a flaw in our DNA or God not seeing this all the way through, whichever school you subscribe too. It just stands to reason that the human race should have been able to evolve. I will let it go for now, but just know that I will be sending out a strongly worded letter to MENSA and The Vatican.

I am willing to concede that the "Cockroach Theory" has not been a great success for me. I am not prepared to completely dismiss it's validity. I just need to take into consideration that conducting this test on myself, has not proved beneficial. I will be applying for a grant to continue this research within the prison systems. Where they will be fed a steady diet of everything sold at 7-11.

The Plan

I will be losing weight this year. I am not doing a New Year's Resolution, that would make me a wuss. I am also not willing to say I am on a diet, that too would lower my machismo. I have, what I refer to as "The Plan". I am going to lose weight by making better choices. I know, pretty earth shattering. The most important part of this plan is not how I will be doing it. It is that I will post my weight weekly, for the world to see.

That is how I am going to do it...because that takes balls.

Current Weight: 346.0 lbs